I have been feeling better lately. I’m not like bubbly or anything, but I am feeling a little bit better about myself. I guess enough to not think that I am a total loser that no one will ever like ever. I was driving around today and I was listening to my mp3 player and this song “Safe Place” came on from Staind. I hadn’t heard it in a while, but, after listening to it, I could identify with it… well except for the being “on the road” part. Anyway… here…

Another day Inside my world
I’m married to you and this road.
A road that never lets me sleep .
So theres no way to escape the demons I am forced to keep.

And then I find you here
Through your eyes
Everything’s clear
And I’m home
Inside your arms,
But I’m alone for now.

I mean the best with what I say.
It doesn’t always sound that way.
I never learned to work things out cause
In my family all we ever seem to do is shout.

But then I find you here
Through your eyes, everythings clear
And I’m home inside your arms, but I’m alone for now.

And when I try to sleep-
the drugs I take
are killing me – I think of you
to ease my pain –
but you’re so far-
Now it’s time to say goodbye.
I love you baby
please don’t cry –
’cause then I’ll find you here –
Through your eyes everythings clear –
and I’m home inside your arms – but I’m alone for now.

But then I find you here
Through your eyes,
everythings clear
And I’m home
inside your arms,
but I’m alone for now.

I do feel like I am alone. I mean physically, I am. And somehow that creeps its way into my head and manifests itself as mental lonliness even though the people that I love are really just a phone call away. A hug though, would be nice, but maybe for now, I am asking too much.